Lessons Part 2 : The Beauty of Giving In

We as a human being have various different characteristic. One of the basic human characters is the sense to fight, the willingness to win, whereas the amount of it depends on each person. Once there is something we really want, naturally we want to chase it until we get it. Moreover, people usually tell us to be the winner of everything, to not to give up easily, and to be the number one in every aspect. I myself used to believe that those theories were true. As I grow up and had chances to jump in bizarre situations in my life, I know now giving in is sometimes necessary.

The fear of losing in one battle, the fear of losing something we want, the fear of losing pride in front of other people. Those were some of the reasons why giving in are such a troll for us. But how we can get through occasion where we have to step back and give up? And what kind of situations are they?

In Islam giving in is a positive manner, noble. It only can be done by the great-hearted ones because letting go something we desire is way beyond easy. There are several types of giving in told in Islam. The first is giving in when you see only a tiny chance to win. This has done by Khaleed bin Al Walid in the War of Mu’tah. He decided to step back after seeing the enormous number of the enemy.

There is also giving in something because of love. It is to see the people we love safe, happy and settle even it means by forfeit our feelings, time and or even our life. The love of parents to their children, the love of a woman to a man, the love of sisters to her siblings, made this type of giving in happens every day in our life.

Dale Carnegie in his famous book titled “How to Win Friends and Influence People” said the benefit of giving in, especially if we have an argument with others.  “You can’t win an argument. You can’t because if you lose it, you lose it; and if you win it, you lose it. Well, suppose you triumph over the other man and shoot his argument full of holes. Then what? You will feel fine. But what about him? You have made him feel inferior. You have hurt his pride. And.. A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still”

When you want some position in your workplace, or in an organization, you want to be it. But what if someone deserves it more than you because he/she is simply better than you? Most people will give everything to get that position, nearly there is someone who is willing to give in. Once again, it only can be done by the great-hearted man, realizing he’s no better than his opponent so he give in for the good of the organization/company.

All in all, giving in is not that bad depends on the situation. Giving in something and forfeit it for the better ones is necessary sometimes. It took sincere heart to be able to do it.  Then when you succeeded doing it, I wish you the best things I can. Because when one door is closed, thousands other opens and because there’s always a silver lining in every cloud. 

o